Setting Intentions
March 2023 Slice of Life challenge
My daughter joined the softball team at her high school this season. I say join because there were no tryouts. She was actually recruited and not because she's an all star player. Rather the coach went digging around and found out she played on the 7th grade team years ago. The coach who is also the assistant principal called my daughter down to her office and put a slight guilt trip on her asking her to join the team. There were not even enough girls to make one team, let alone a JV and varsity teams, so the coach really needed bodies to make this season happen.
Not that long ago I asked my daughter if she ever thought she'd play softball again because I wanted to sell the giant box full of softball things in the garage. She gave me the go ahead and from my driveway I sold everything to one lucky mother and her preteen daughter. And when I say I sold everything, I mean everything: cleats, pants, socks, belt, bats, bags, batting gloves. I tried to talk my daughter out of joining. I told her to remember how intense the volleyball season was with practices, games and long bus rides. All of that making it hard to study for her honors and AP classes as well as taking away time from practicing her instrument and going to her harp lessons. I knew she was being guilted into making this decision and it really wasn't her own idea or desire. It didn't help that my dad is a huge baseball/softball fan and encouraged my daughter to join the team, a little too much if you ask me. Grandma and grandpa even footed the bill for all of the brand new items we needed to get her started on the team. Dick's Sporting Goods says thank you grandma and grandpa. Then my daughter went to a few practices, saw the game and practice schedules as well as all of the extra "bonding" activities and declared "you were right. I should have listened to you." I told her she should get out now before the season has officially started. But she won't. She says she is not a quitter. I explained to her that she was manipulated and guilted into it and there are times when she should not do things for other people, but should instead think of herself first. You may think this is bad advice but there are other factors at play in our lives that I can't write about here that make this the best advice I can give her right now. But of course she will not change course. My only hope now is that she gets something unexpectedly good out of being on this team. And me too, can I get something unexpectedly good out of this experience? Because this will definitely inconvenience my daughter but it is gonna kill me too. Help.
1 Comment
3/9/2022 07:53:20 am
Boy, I feel your conflict! Proud you must be of a daughter who commits and stays with a commitment (no matter how ill-advised), but manipulated, too, both she and you, because let's face it, kids' sports/activities are parents,' too. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you both. (And hoping that silver linings are up ahead.)
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